Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."


In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."


On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon :
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels


On another Septic Tank Truck:
"We're #1 in the #2 business"


At a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."


On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."


On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.."


On a Church's Billboard:
"7 days without God makes one weak."


At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
"Invite us to your next blowout"


On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"


At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."


On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts"


In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."


On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."


At an Optometrist's Office :
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."


On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."


On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"


At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."


Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."


In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"


At the Electric Company :
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be."


In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up."


In the front yard of a Funeral Home :
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."


At a Propane Filling Station
"Thank heaven for little grills."

Replying to [rchas]:Dear rchas,
Patient should say to Gynaecologist "Dilated to meet you"
sixer

Replying to [rchas]:There are two restaurants in my city across from each other.

First one sell Vegie Food with the sign "EAT HERE AND LIVE HAPPY"

The second is a BBQ steak house with the sign "EAT HERE AND DIE HAPPY"

Your pick Lady and Gentlement.

Replying to [rchas]:Written at the back of a car"If you can read this, you are too close"
Sixer